I Realized This Afternoon While Driving to Connecticut

Last Tuesday - I sat across
from another - stupid record label boss.
He told me - I play the notes
too perfect - I should try to be more like the Strokes.
It made me so depressed that now I can't get out of bed.
He wouldn't know an artist if I kicked him in the head.

I saw the brass ring but I'm never, ever getting it
I realized this afternoon while driving to Connecticut.

West Hartford - is pretty far
from Philadelphia - about five hours in the car.
It gave me - time to think about
my life and - now I really have no doubt
unless I get a nipple ring, unless I shave my head
I better call a doctor to pronounce my career dead.

I saw the brass ring - I'm never, ever getting it
I realized this afternoon while driving to Connecticut.

I've read there was a time that
there were Record Execs who had ears to hear a well constructed melody -
that kind of person would do well with me.
But now it seems they only
want you if you're angry and you play two chords and shout out some obscenities -
and since I don't do that, the hell with me.

They're supposed to be in A&R - yet they can't understand
how this song I played on my guitar would sound played by a band.
Or, they'd really love to sign me - but they're sorry, they're not able
because Howie Day did not sell enough units for their label.
Or it's just because my face is something less than photographic
or 'cuz I don't have 14 year old girls making my demographic.
I could keep on going on with their pathetic, lame excuses
but then I'd have to keep on driving all the way through Massachusettes.

I saw the brass ring and I'm never, ever, never, ever, never, ever, never, ever, never, ever, ever, never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever . . .

I saw the brass ring - I'm never, ever getting it
I realized this afternoon while driving to Connecticut.